Like the Waves of the Ocean

Last night I was lying awake for a long time... not nearly as long as the night before but it was a little different last night. At night the pain increases and even with a pain killer I can't manage to close my weary eyes and fall asleep. I put my headphones in my ears and decided to listen to some music. I thought just maybe that would help me. As the music was playing I had the perfect picture of me walking along my favorite place. The beach on Coronado Island, where I usually go to clear my head and have that moment with God in His creation. As I was listening to the music I was taken back to the place where I sat on the rocks watching the waves crash against them and the sun gleaming marvelously on the water. My mind was totally in tuned to the worship music and the visualization of me on the beach. The pain didn't seem to be bothering me as much. All that mattered was I was laying in the hands of my Savior. It was a beautiful moment. God gave me a visualization of how powerful He really is. His power is beyond my comprehension but the waves crashing perfectly along the rocks was a reminder for me. His power is like the waves of an ocean. It can sweep you up before you have a chance to swim away. It can take you to another destination, and it can give you the ride of your life.


God's power is a mighty one, that's for sure. God has the healing power beyond what doctors can do. I know that He also has ultimate comfort during the hard times. It is through His comfort and His power that I can move on. I can walk the journey onward with Him.

Right now it is definitely hard. I can't say that it isn't or I'd be lying. There are days when the pain becomes brutal, and there are days when I can say it's not so bad I can tolerate it. But after this week of staying in the hospital, and hearing about the numorous prayers going up on my behalf, and knowing how many people love me and care about me, I think, how blessed I am to belong to God's wonderful family. Today I was able to go to church for the first time in about a month. How awesome was that to be back. The service hit home for me. It was a beautiful service and a message about the power of prayer. I won't go into the whole message here, but let's just say God is moving, and His power is definitely released through us.


I know that I can continue with His strength. I look forward to the day I will meet Jesus face to face when I walk through the gates to my eternal destiny, and when Jesus says to me, "Welcome home my child, well done my good and faithful servant." What a glorious day that will be. But until that day I want to continue to run the race with perseverance and keeping my eyes fixed upon Him. Even in pain I never want to stop living my life for Him, and Going to where He has called me to go.

When the Storms Arise

Well, some storms have come again and set before me is a choice. I can either continue to walk forward and with God's help rise above the storms, or I can say I'm tired of the storms and the feeling of defeat time and time again. I can say the pain is too big, the waves are too high for me it'll be easier to walk away now while I still can. But I know that if I say the words "I give up," I am letting the enemy win. I don't want to give the enemy a foothold here. I want to continue to walk forward, and I want to be all who God has called me to be.


Right now, I have to be honest. It is hard. I don't understand why when everything was going so well, a curve ball has come, and it seems as though all has crumbled before me. I may never know why sometimes things go the way that they do. But I don't think that is what is important, I don't need to know why. I believe that God wants me to just keep my eyes up, and though the pain may rise, God will rise higher. God has been with me through the storms in the past, and He promises that He always will be. With that promise, I can walk forward. God is all that I need, and He is my healer. It may seem that there is a thorn in my flesh that hasn't gone away. But even if God decides to never take that thorn away, it isn't going to stop me from living my life for Him.



There is nothing that can happen to me that will make me turn the other way. No matter how painful it may be, I still want to serve my King with all that I have. God wants me to be a missionary, He wants me to share Jesus through the streets, and He wants me to be a follower in His steps and pick up the cross and follow Him. Jesus knows what I am going through, He suffered everything that I suffer from and even more, all for love. When I hurt, Jesus hurts, He shares my pain. But Jesus says, "Cast all your anxiety on Me, because I care for you." ( 1 Peter 5:7) I can feel God's hands upon me. Through the pain and tear filled eyes, I can see His face, I can feel Him leading me through.


I Thank God For The Mountains, and I Thank Him For The Valleys, I Thank Him For The Storms He Brought Me Through. For If I'd Never Had A Problem, I Wouldn't Know God Could Solve Them, I'd Never Know What Faith In God Could Do.


So with that, my choice is made. I've chosen to follow my Lord through it all. I will walk through this storm, and I know that God will lead me through to the otherside. I will live my life for Him, and will serve Him everyday for the rest of my life, and look forward to the day that I will be with Him for all eternity.