What Breaks my Heart

Holiday season has officially begun. Thanksgiving is just a couple short days away, and Christmas will be coming shortly after. These times are a time of remembrance, a time of reflection, a time of joy... but what about those who don't have that joy? Those who are alone? Those who don't have the hope, and the love of Jesus within them? What about them? These times can be a time of pain for so many people. People who are grieving, who are suffering, and people who spend day in and day out without even being noticed... who feel like they don't matter to another soul in the world.

Yesterday I noticed a homeless lady on the corner, I saw the pain in her eyes. I almost broke down right there in tears, I had to grip it because I was driving, but my heart broke for her. Her eyes were filled with sorrow. There are millions of people in this world who don't know Jesus, and millions who filled with sorrow. Suicide rates are rising, because people are searching for a way out, and come to the point where they feel like death is their only option. It is incredibly sad to know this, and hear about it. I still think of all the people I talked to in San Francisco, all the time. I visualize their faces, their tear filled eyes, and I can still hear them tell me that they feel like a nobody... they feel worthless. I can still hear them share with me their story, what people have done to them, things that have happened in their life, and wishing they had someone who loved them. I was not ashamed to put my arms around them. I wanted them to know how much they mattered, and how much their Savior does love them. I want that mission to continue, and God has placed that passion so strongly on my heart.

There is no greater love than the love of Jesus. This is the time of year we celebrate it, but I hope we will celebrate it year round. As the joyous season comes along, I don't want to forget the true meaning of it. I don't want to be so caught up in the busyness of it that I don't notice the hurting person standing on the corner. My heart's passion is to love those who don't know what love is. To be the hands of feet of Jesus. I pray that Jesus will shine so strongly in me, that when people look at me they see the light of Jesus. I pray that God will melt the heart of stone. I pray that God will move radically within the walls of the city, and throughout the hearts of every young and old person there is. God is the God of the impossible, and He can and does far more than what we can ever imagine. God chooses His children to be His instruments, to be ambassadors in His Kingdom. May His Kingdom come.

God has ruined my heart for Him. Something that I can't explain in words. I completely want my life to be surrendered to Him. I want my life to be all about giving Him the glory, and letting people know who Jesus is. That is my calling. To live for Jesus my Savior. God and God alone. I am here to sit next to a hurting person, to listen to there broken hearts and to say you are valuable... so valuable that God gave His one and only Son to die for you.

I cannot look in the pain in someone's eyes and ignore it. Each time I notice someone alone my heart does break. I know that Jesus weeps over them. Jesus feels their pain, and Jesus does care. I pray that they may feel Jesus over them, and His loving arms holding them tight. I pray that God will use me to uplift them, and that God will work in their hearts. I pray that their pain will be healed, and they can live as another testimony of how great our God is.

God Continues to Amaze Me

I know it has been quite some time since the last blog was posted. I've been trying to maintain them as much as possible, but life craziness sometimes has a way of taking over.... November has been a pretty busy month. Projects needed to be edited, and printed, community meetings to attend to, Genesis connects to listen in, etc... But life has been good here in sunny San Diego. In Mexico homes continue to be built each weekend by several teams, and schools continue to move right along.

I have been busy in the office making sure brochures and fliers are printed, as well as other print work that needs to be done. Some thing that is very exciting is we are gearing up for San Diego ministry. I along with two others will be meeting each week, and we will be preparing for Mission Adventures to join us in San Diego next year. In the prayer meeting this week, it was brought up that once a month we have city prayer walks as staff. That would be a great opportunity for all of us. As a team, we will be going through the city and getting ourselves familiar with what it is all about. I am very excited to see what God is going to do throughout all of this. I am glad He has brought me here and that the doors are opening for me to step foot into city ministry with my co-workers. God has placed the strong passion on my heart which has been around even before I joined YWAM. It is amazing how when I said yes to God and each and every step I took was a step of faith. I had no idea what God was going to do and I have no idea what He is going to do in the future. But as I continue on the journey of faith I know God will continue to move the mountains and open the doors to more opportunities and ways that I can serve Him.

God has placed the desire, and it amazes me how much He has led me through the past few years and even beyond that. I can testify that waiting on the Lord and trusting in His will and perfect time is worth everything I have and everything I've been through. I can only walk one step and one day at a time. Each day a new blessing comes, and through all circumstances God continues to build my character. I am here for the purpose to serve my King and no one else. God has called me to city ministry, and I know He will continue to lead me to it and through everything. Only He knows where I'll go next, but all I can say is I am ready and willing no matter what that may be.